Help! I Hate My First Job!

I'm probably not the best person to give you advice on this topic, since I have to admit something: I once walked off the job.

It was early in my career and I could tell I did not like the company, the actual job--or anything about the office. I think it was my second or third day when the anxiety welling up in me couldn't take it anymore. I knew it was what I should do but I was revolted by the thought of working for the company. (Almost as much as I would later find that I didn't want to pursue my major in environmental science.) Even though I could have been okay at that job, I knew I was not going to like it--but it was the people, the office and the entire corporate culture that I detested the most. In my case, I knew what I was getting into when I took the job because I could tell what the place was like, but, like many grads, I just wanted to get that first job.

The boss was very nice and offered to give me another shot after my walk-off, but I went with my gut (which was more like listening to my fear in those days.) Anyway, I don't regret it. But it's not something I am proud of. In fact, hardly anyone knows about my blip and I'm not going to pretend that I my decision was a smart choice--but it was best for me at the time, as ridiculous as it may sound.

Sometimes, I think about my short stint at that company. Back in "those days" (only about 10 years ago, I'm not that ancient) the country wasn't in a recession and jobs were more plentiful--and it seems simpler to get. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with my life and thought a career in environmental science was my only option.

Still, I know there are new grads out there that are miserable in their jobs. Here are some concepts to consider before you fly the coup.

Consider the economy. Yes, practicality comes first. I know it's easy to wonder who could consider leaving their job if they have one, but I also understand the unrest that comes with being in an odd environment and feeling like you made a huge mistake taking the job. So if you're mildly uncomfortable with the workplace, give it time and consider your financial situation. Don't feel guilty about taking the job--these are tough times and I doubt anyone can blame you for taking something that you probably knew would be a bust from the start. Sometimes you have to go with your gut, but you should always use your noggin, too.

Assess your hatin'. Think about why you don't like the job. Can anything good come from you being there? In my case, it would have been an impressive addition to my resume, and had I stayed in the environmental field, it would have been a great foundation. Sometimes a job can be good but the corporate culture is off--and that can make for a miserable work experience. The opposite can happen where you hate the job but the office is cool. Even though there are negatives, there is no need to ditch the job because you'll find negatives everywhere in life. You just have to look at what you don't like and see if you can work to resolve those things (Crabby coworker? Can you move cubicles?) or if you cannot. Get a firm grasp on what you don't like. Give it a few days to really examine the situation and your feelings. If you leave you want to be sure you made a sound decision with a clear mind.

Devise positives. Sometimes you've gotta make good things happen. So if you're out getting coffee for the senior management team instead of working on the "hot" campaign they described in the interview, try to find the positives. Everyone has to pay dues, even though you may not want to hear it. So while the work may, well, suck, other positives can come from it. If you've taken a job knowing it will be a positive in the long run, make some positives for the short term. Make friends at the office or learn as much as you can while you're there. Find the positives and make those work for you. Most first jobs are just about passing time to get a solid foundation on your resume, so don't freak out if you don't love everything about the job...chances are, you won't.

But if you do freak out...(and yes, I mean literally)...

Gauge your physical state. In some cases, as was with mine, I felt a lot of physical anxiety at this job. Sometimes I wish I had given it more time, but I just had a strong feeling that nothing good could really come of it, and that if I was that ill (and hadn't been at other jobs in the past) it was better to bolt. I'm not saying that if you have a nervous tummy you should leave; but I know a lot of new grads are prone to having anxiety and depression and that's important to consider. You may be in a place where you cannot get out of those feelings and leaving can actually be the best decision.

Play the time card. Sometimes things do get better with time. The first few days of a job you are probably filling out paperwork and training. Everything is foreign. Even just being in an office can scare the daylights out of you. You may not be given full responsibilities yet, so you may want to give things time to see if you may wind up liking the job.



Here are my final thoughts: First jobs are awkward. Obviously, you will probably not be anywhere near what you ultimately see yourself doing. But that's okay and totally normal. The goal is to find a job that you can do well and grow from. Maybe the work stinks but the coworkers make up for it. Or the benefits do. Maybe you wind up loving the work but hating the office atmosphere.

There's no right answer to give anyone who is considering leaving a job. Maybe it's best to bolt right away so that gig never winds up on your resume. Maybe it's best to stick around and start searching again.

But whatever you choose, I hope that opening up lets you know that you are not alone. That no job is perfect, but eventually, you'll find something that clicks.